Lost Tears of Love
by saihei
Summary: Summary: Kenshin and Kaoru are married. Kenshin was shadowed by the idea that his wife was still in-love with his brother, Shinta. He loves Kaoru and she loves him, but they're both lost...will they find each other?


**LOST TEARS OF LOVE**

saihei

Disclaimer: I don't own RK but I really love it ^^

Summary: Kenshin and Kaoru are married. Kenshin was shadowed by the idea that his wife was still in-love with his brother, Shinta. He loves Kaoru, but as he was feeling hurt by the thought that Kaoru does not love him back, he keeps on hurting her. Set on modern time. Romance/Drama KK rated T.

**o+++++0+++++o**

" " – real time conversation

'_Italic' – _thinking / flashback event

_Italic – _song lyrics

_Italic_ – start or end of a flashback story

**o+++++0+++++o**

Kaoru was standing by the window of her former apartment. She escaped her bodyguards prying eyes and went to visit her old home.

She had live in this small apartment a year before she got married. This place was the witness of her tears when she lost her first love, and also was her cradle when a new love came and saved her from her deteriorating soul.

That was she thought...

_'I am a woman.'_ Her sapphire eyes stared solemnly out of the window. _'I am a teacher.'_ She smiled and tried to rain her thoughts with memories of her teaching life; her students, their happy stories and genuine smiles. _'I am a wife.'_ This time, she felt her eyes turned blurry as tears start to fall.

A knock on the door snapped Kaoru out of her thoughts. She sauntered to the door and opened it. "Yes?"

Misao, her young assistant smiled at her. "Miss Kaoru, we have to go now. The president is on his way back to the mansion."

Kaoru understood, her husband, a wealthy business man who owns most of the big businesses all throughout Japan. He definitely won't like the idea of his 'wife' leaving the mansion without his consent.

"Misao-chan, will it be possible that I could go back to this place again?" Kaoru asked. She already stepped out of her apartment and locked the door.

Misao handed a white coat and a pair of sunglasses to Kaoru. "I will do my best Kaoru-san. But for now we have to hurry back before the president find out that you left the mansion."

Kaoru agreed. She knew that there was no other way but to agree with Misao.

They left the premise and headed straight back to the Himura Mansion.

Two maids welcomed Kaoru home. She smiled at them and allowed them to take her white coat off her shoulder. She removed her sun-glasses and made her way up to their room.

Misao bid her farewell. The young woman had to go and meet her husband who just returned from the business trip. Misao's husband was her husband's personal secretary.

Kaoru sighed and waited for the master of the house to meet her. She sat quietly on their bed and waited patiently.

She let her mind drift for a while...she tried to remember Shinta, Shinta Himura.

_FLASHBACK..._

_She was only 12 years old. And if she remembers clearly, at the tender age of 23 Shinta was the newly assigned president of Himura Enterprise. She could almost see her father's sweet smile again as she got introduce to the young heir. _

_"Hello." Kaoru apprehensively bowed her head. She was wearing her favorite yellow kimono. As the only daughter of Kamiya Finance Incorporation, she must act and look as perfect as everyone expected._

_The young man with gentle purple eyes and red mane smiled and knelt in front of her. "How are you Kaoru-chan?" He took something out from his suit's pocket. It was a small blue rectangular box. Kaoru's innocent eyes brightened with excitement."Will you wear this? I think it will look best with your kimono." _

_Kaoru nodded quickly, her eyes glued to the blue box. The young man opened it and revealed a golden hair pin. It was beautiful. On the top, it holds two small sapphire gems with crimson garnet in the middle. "Wow!" She giggled. _

_The young man answered Kaoru's giggle with a soft smile. He placed the hair pin on top of Kaoru's hair bun. "There you go, all pretty Kaoru-chan." _

_Kaoru nodded and let the young man pat her head. She loved his smile. It was very gentle and loving. _

_End of Flashback..._

Those were the old times...

Kaoru blinked her eyes and fight the tears which once again tempting to fall. She took a deep breath and watched the door knob clicked open. 'He's here.' She noted.

The newly opened door revealed a 31 year old man. His hair was short and crimson. He was wearing a collared blue shirt paired with black pants. Kaoru noticed a white tie hanging loose in the man's right hand. It was newly remove, she thought.

Then she met his eyes...

Kaoru felt her heart ached, his eyes do not possess the gentleness she loved so much those eyes were amber, gold and fiery.

"Did you leave the house?" The man asked.

"No Kenshin." She lied. "I stayed her all week." Kaoru said simply.

Kenshin nodded and walked closer to his wife. He let his newly removed tie fell on the floor and sat beside Kaoru.

Kaoru watched her husband's every move. He moves soundlessly. Even his business clothes did not make a sound when he sat closer to her.

She felt his left hand touched her back. "Koshii, did you miss me?"

Kaoru did not reply.

Kenshin raised an eyebrow. "Answer me."

Kaoru looked at her joined hand resting idly on her lap. "Kenshin...you promised me that I can go back to teaching after a year of our marriage."

Kenshin ignored her. He pushed her down on the bed and start kissing her neck.

Kaoru did not insist when her husband touched her hands. He forcedly removed the knot and held her right hand tightly.

"You promised Kenshin." Kaoru said again.

Kenshin growled and sat back up, letting go of Kaoru's hand. "Woman..." His amber eyes burning as he glared at her face. "I know what I said, you don't have to remind me. "

Kaoru slowly sat up and looked at Kenshin's clenched hands. "I'm sorry, it's just that...I miss my students so much."

Kenshin scoffed.

Kaoru stood up and picked the discarded white tie on the floor and placed it on top of her dresser. "Kenshin, I can't stand being alone here. You're always away…when we meet it's not even an hour long. You always go home late and..." She sighed and looked at her husband's eyes. "...when we make love...we don't even talk."

Kenshin stood up and began to unbutton his shirt. "What are you saying? What do you think we're doing now?"

Kaoru watched Kenshin removed his shirt and put on a new white shirt he took from the closet. "Not like this Kenshin."

Kenshin threw another glare at Kaoru. "I'm not 'him'...I will never talk like him." He said with his usual low voice.

He watched his wife's eyes turned weary. He's making her cry again. Why the hell this woman loves crying so much? He asked himself. But deep inside, he knew how he hates it when Kaoru cries.

But what can he do? Isn't it just fair that he hurts her as much as she hurts him? Him, who was known as the heartless business tycoon of Himura Enterprise. He was once invincible, unbreakable...but she broke him.

Every time she looks at him like she was looking at somebody else. Every time she touches him like she was touching someone else. Every time she makes love with him and feels like he was a replacement for the man of her dreams. She breaks him…pieces by pieces.

And he hates every second of it...because he is strong…was strong. Emotions never controlled him but when he looks at her… he could feel every damn emotion a normal man could feel. Anger, lust, sadness and love...and all other emotions he never knew before, flashing before his eyes every time he looks at her.

Kaoru let her tears flow. "That's not what I meant Kenshin..." She was getting weaker and weaker after each time they bicker. It was not suppose to be like this. They should be happy. Like her dream.

"I know what you mean!" Kenshin shouted. "You want me to understand you. You want me to give in to your every wish like 'he' once did!" His heart was aching again. "But I'm not him Kaoru. I will never be like him." He finished his word and starts to head out of the room.

Kaoru followed him. "Kenshin wait! Can we just talk...please..." She pleaded.

But Kenshin ignored her. He stepped out of the room and Kaoru was left standing behind the close door. "Kenshin..." Kaoru whimpered sofly.

**o+++++0+++++o**

Kenshin walked out of the room and went to the bar. He took a bottle of wine and glass from the cabinet.

The dim lighted room seemed like a mirror of his emotion; dark and vague.

He chose to occupy one of the empty bar seats and started sipping the wine.

The bar was just a part of this big mansion. The house was really big for two people, which was why Kaoru hired two maids to accompany her every time he leaves.

He grew up in this mansion. This empty mansion which full of sad and tormenting stories he does not want to remember.

Himura's are known to be one of the richest families in Japan. They own the biggest businesses, from automobiles to real estates, and after his wedding...they now own the biggest finance company, the Kamiya Finance Incorporation.

Kenshin watched his hand tightened on his glass. He is a very powerful man...but in this house...he is as weak as a young boy who lost his favorite toy against his _'brother'_.

'_Yes_'...that was a nice way of putting it. But the harsh reality of losing his heart was incomparable than losing his favorite toy.

Kenshin fought his urge to scream and just took another swig from his wine glass. He put it down as harsh as the way he wind it up.

From his peripheral vision he noticed the piano Kaoru loves so much.

_'Fuck...'_ He cursed and poured more wine into his glass to just drink it a second later. "How I wished it was me who died and not you...Shinta."

Kenshin felt his heart ached again.

He doesn't hate Kaoru. The truth is; he loves her so much he can't bear to share her affection to anyone else. But even how hard he tries to keep her all for himself he can't fight a dead guy.

_'If I was the one who died...I won't be feeling this.'_ Kenshin said, full of hatred. _'I can't stand being a substitute...I am very much alive to replace you.'_

Shinta died a year before he married Kaoru. He was Kaoru's_ real _love...

_FLASHBACK..._

_Kenshin and Shinta were twins. _

_Physically, they look almost the same. The only flaw was that, Kenshin have fiery golden eyes while Shinta have violet gentle eyes. _

_Shinta was gentle as the blooming flowers of spring. He loves talking to people, he loves smiling a lot and people love him too. On the other hand, Kenshin act as cold as the winter rain. He doesn't talk a lot. He smiles, but only for those people close to him. They were an exact opposite some says. _

_Shinta was gentle and kind. Always smiling and he had this aura of befriending every person he met...and Kaoru was his fiancée._

_That was the real plan._

_In business world, it was normal for wealthy families to betroth their children. Especially if the joining will bring more profit to both families and strengthen their businesses. _

_Shinta, as always the obedient one did not refuse when he got engage with a 12 year old girl. After all he agreed to take over the family business after their mother died. _

_Kenshin did not care about it. He remembered telling his brother how stupid he was to agree with such agreement. "That was a young girl. You can't even kiss her." He mocked. _

_Shinta smiled and shook his head. "Kaoru is a very nice girl. I'm sure she'll be a very beautiful woman."_

_Kenshin snickered and put his arm around his brother's shoulder. "Damn, you're only 23. Don't tell me you won't be kissing girls not 'til that brat became older." _

_Shinta showed his gentle smile again. "That is not a very bad idea; I want to be a loyal fiancé."_

_Kenshin laughed and hit his brother's arm. "You're really nuts. She's only 12, she won't know if you'll run around kissing girls everywhere."_

_Shinta shook his head. "Kaoru is a very smart girl that she is. I will not do that to her."_

_Kenshin stopped laughing and looked at his brother's purple eyes. "So when's the wedding?"_

_Shinta smiled and stared back to his brother's golden orbs. "…on her 18th birthday."_

_"Oh, so you still have six years to try other girls." Kenshin teased which made Shinta blush a little. _

_Five years quickly pass... _

_Shinta as the heir of the Himura family traveled almost everywhere. He was never lazy. On the other hand, Kenshin was as free as a bird. _

_Kenshin never showed interest to business. Whenever their father Hiko Himura tried to put him to any of their businesses, he immediately leaves the country telling his dad indirectly that he won't give a damn about their family business. _

_At one time, Shinta went home with the young 17 year old Kaoru. Kenshin was amazed on how pretty she had grown. _

_"Hello Kenshin-nii." She greeted him with a smile as soft as Shinta's. _

_Kenshin nodded uninterestingly. "Hi." He do not smile to people he just met. He met her when she was 12 but still, she is a stranger. _

_"C'mon brother, you could have at least showed a smile to my fiancée." Shinta said with a bright smile. _

_Kenshin lifted an eyebrow. "Shut-up smiley face." He then turned around and left the couple alone. _

_He even told himself that they look good together. Kaoru and Kenshin's smiles matched each other, they look like the main cast of the chick-flick movies that his friend Misao loves watching. _

_He never thought that one day...he will hate that idea as much as he liked it before._

_In the final year before Shinta and Kaoru were set to be married. Shinta had been very busy with foreign business agreements he was trying hard to close. _

_He remembered talking to his brother prior his trip to Sydney..._

_"Dad said that I have to close this deal, so that when Kaoru and I marry I would be able to have a year-long vacation. Isn't that great?" Shinta said. His smile was too big Kenshin even thought his brother was going crazy. _

_Kenshin scoffed. "I don't think so, that old-man's killing you, bribing you with a year-long vacation? If you really want to spend that much time with Kaoru then why just ditch your work and fly with her to a very deserted country and take her all to yourself."_

_Shinta blushed and covered Kenshin's mouth. "What are you saying? W-We're not yet reaching that part of our relationship." He said, almost whispering. _

_Kenshin pushed Shinta away and wiped his mouth of Shinta's touch. "What? You're hopeless, you've been waiting for almost 6 years and you're telling me you haven't 'done' that with her?" He frowned. "Are you gay?"_

_"No I'm not." Shinta retorted defensively. "I just don't want to scare her. She's so young and innocent."_

_"I'm sure she won't be as innocent in bed." Kenshin said with an evil smirk. _

_Shinta blushed more and turned around. He started walking away without word, but then he halted and looked back at Kenshin. _

_Kenshin alerted himself, expecting Shinta to reprimand him because of his foul jokes but that didn't happen. _

_Shinta showed his infamous gentle smile and placed a hand on Kenshin's shoulder. "I'll be very busy and Kaoru is getting more and more emotional lately..." Kenshin watched his brother took a deep breath and patted his shoulder. "...can you please watch over her while I'm gone, I'm worried she might get into trouble because of her emotional self."_

_Kenshin was awestruck by the trust he never thought Shinta has for him. He knew that Kaoru was his most important person, and he trusted her to him. Kenshin couldn't help but smile. "Sure bro, you can count on me."_

_Shinta's smile widened and hugged Kenshin. "I know Kenshin, please take care of her."_

_Kenshin hugged his brother back._

_He never thought that that was the last time he will be able to see him. _

_The next day, Kenshin got waken up by a phone call. It was Kaoru. "Woman, it's damn too early to pester me with Shinta's wherebouts." He said knowing perfectly that this morning calls usually lead to Kaoru asking him questions about his brother. But the voice on other line filled his heart with worries. "Why are you crying Kaoru?"_

_"K-Kenshin-nii, i-is it true?" Kaoru's voice was shaking terribly. _

_"What do you mean?" Kenshin prodded. _

_A knock on his room's door surprised him. "Hold on Kaoru." He said and opened the door. "Dad?" His golden eyes met his father's dark orbs. _

_Hiko's eyes were as dark as the day he and his twin brother found out that their mother have died. "Kenshin get ready."_

_"Why? It's so early for me to-" Kenshin was cut by his father's next statement._

_"Shinta is dead. His plane crashed." _

_The next thing Kenshin knew was his world stopped moving. He totally forgot that there was a crying girl waiting for him to go back to the phone. _

_The year that was supposed to be the happiest year for Kaoru and Shinta's life became the saddest year for both Kenshin and Kaoru. _

_Who have thought that a plan laid out perfectly 6 years ago will be shattered in one glimpse?_

_"Kaoru let's go." Kenshin said as he tried to help Kaoru stand up from crying on Shinta's tomb. _

_All the people who attented the burial had left. Even Hiko had left already. _

_Kenshin could not bear to leave the girl Shinta loved so much. "Kaoru, we have to leave now. The rain is getting heavier."_

_Kaoru didn't budge. Her tears overflowing, she was holding a golden hairpin very close to her chest. "This is not true." She whimpered. "This is just a bad dream...Shinta...is here..."_

_Kenshin bit his lower lip. "Kaoru we have to go." He said again, this time more firm. _

_Kaoru smiled ruefully and closed her eyes. As if, she's dreaming of something. "When I close my eyes and open it, everything will go back to normal..." Her tears never stop flowing. "Shinta will call me again tonight...telling me to be a nice girl...reminding me that our wedding...our wedding will be just a month...away..."_

_Kenshin felt his heart ached more. He was never the emotional guy. He hates the idea of getting succumbed to this human weakness. _

_The next thing he did, surprised kaoru. "STOP IT!" Kenshin pulled Kaoru up to where she was crouching and forced her to look at him. "This is real, Shinta is gone. You have to accept it." He watched Kaoru opened her close eyes. "He maybe no longer here, but you're still alive and you have to move on, Kaoru." Kenshin said as gentle as he knew he could say._

_Kenshin felt Kaoru grew limb from his firm hold. "You don't understand..." She said softly, her wet face leaning on Kenshin's chest. "When he left...he took my heart...with him."_

_That was Kaoru's last word before she fainted. _

_Kenshin watched Kaoru's unconscious face. That moment, Kenshin was able to marvel how beautiful had she become. He smiled sadly and wiped some of the tears that kept on falling from Kaoru's closed eyes. "Kaoru..."_

_Kenshin gently picked Kaoru and stared at the tomb where she was staring for more than three hours. He pictured Shinta's smiling face, the face he showed the day before the accident. _

_'...please take care of her.'_

_That was his last word. His last smile. His last embrace. _

_Kenshin looked up to the dark sky. "Even the heavens mourn for you my dear brother..." He looked down and stared at Kaoru face. "And I think, I'll be the most affected of all...leaving me this woman you treasured so much."_

_Days...weeks...and months had pass by._

_Kaoru was still mourning and was not talking to anybody else. Some said that she was like a walking doll following everything her parents tell her. She stopped showing the emotion Shinta was always worried about. _

_Kenshin took everything Shinta have left; the business and the agreement. _

_"What the hell did you say?" Kenshin asked angrily, his golden eyes glaring at his father's dark orbs. _

_"The agreement will continue. As everything else, you took over the business and since your brother is no longer here, you will marry Kaoru as part of the said agreement." Hiko said simply. _

_"You're ridiculous. How could you simply say that I will marry her, she loves Shinta so much…" Kenshin said. _

_"Kenshin, you look exactly as your brother. I'm sure she can love you too." Hiko answered. _

_"What am I? A substitute?" Kenshin asked angrily. _

_Hiko sighed. "Kaoru's father is worse than me. He will wed Kaoru to anyone who will seem beneficial to his business. Do you think I'm that heartless to put that girl into this? I'm doing the thing I think will be best for her..." His eyes turned somber as he remembered his other son. "I heard that if we don't push through the agreement they will wed Kaoru to Makoto's son. You know how evil that family is...Kaoru will have a living hell of a married life. Would you like that instead?"_

_Kenshin watched his father take a deep breath. "Shinta treasured her so much. It's the least I could do...saving her from a hellish life."_

_"And how sure are you that her life with me won't be as hellish?" Kenshin asked jerkily. _

_Hiko smiled and crossed his arms. "You can say that...but I know that you will not do that." _

_Kenshin raised an eyebrow. "You wanna bet?"_

_Hiko stifled a small laugh. "I know you have love Kaoru since the moment you saw her that time when Shinta brought her home. Maybe you can fool your brother and everyone around you, but not me Kenshin. I am your father."_

_Kenshin was shocked. How did his father know? _

_Kenshin did not bother to ask his father. He was a bit disturbed to know the answer. He chose to stay quiet about the issue and agreed to marry Kaoru._

_A year after Shinta's death, Kaoru was 19 and Kenshin was 31 years old when they got married._

_A month before the wedding Kenshin and Kaoru talked about Shinta's death. _

_They were at the garden of Kamiya Mansion. It was a bright day; they were sitting on a wooden bench while Kaoru was feeding some of her pet birds. Kenshin was glad that Kaoru looked much better now. _

_She gained her normal weight and was smiling while watching the birds fed on the seeds she threw. Maybe living far from her business oriented family helped a lot. When Kaoru found out that she would marry Kenshin, she begged Kenshin to help her get an apartment of her own, telling Kenshin that the mansion brings a lot of Shinta's memories. Kenshin helped her; he was thinking that this would be better for Kaoru to move on. _

_"Kaoru, I know it won't be easy for you..." Kenshin started. _

_Kaoru smiled and looked at him. "It's okay Kenshin." She pushed some strand of her hair into the back of her ear. Since the day that her mother told her that she will be marrying Kenshin, she had stop calling him -nii. "I'm okay now...thank you for all the time you stayed for me whenever I feel weak because of Shinta's lost, but I'm okay now." _

_Keshin remained quiet and listened to Kaoru's words carefully. _

_"I'm happy to know that I'll be marrying such a wonderful man. I know, he will be happy to see his two most important people take care of each other." Kaoru said, she moved closer to Kenshin and held his hand. "Kenshin, thank you for taking care of me. I promise you, I will be a good wife."_

_Kenshin doesn't know what to tell her. He just stared at her sapphire eyes. _

_He should be happy. The woman he love agreed and promised that she will be a good wife. But his heart was reacting otherwise. _

_Kaoru's eyes looked at him like he was not there. Her eyes look passed through him. _

_He knew why he felt that way…because she was not looking at him...she was looking at Shinta...through him._

_And it breaks him...piece by piece._

_End of Flashback..._

Kenshin turned his eyes away from the piano and finished the last drop of the expensive wine.

He and Kaoru had been married for almost a year now. He sometimes laughs at the idea that the woman was able to last with this relationship for a year.

When he promised her that he will let her go back to teaching after a year of their marriage, he said that, thinking Kaoru would file a divorce after five or six months of being married with him.

After all, he had not been a good husband.

A month after their marriage, Kenshin started to distance himself from Kaoru. He made himself more busy dealing with foreign business affairs. For the third and second month of their marriage, he was only home four times. He was out of the country most of the time.

He did not like it, but it was way more better than staying with his wife who was actually more in-love with a dead guy that her own husband.

Kenshin's train of thought was cut by the presence he felt behind him. He took another bottle out of the wine cabinet and opened it. "Why are you still awake? It's way past midnight Kaoru." He said as cold as ice.

Kaoru walked closer and sat on the seat next to him. "Kenshin, I can drink too you know." She even smiled when she took the bottle of wine from Kenshin's grasp and pour some into her own glass.

Kenshin totally ignored her even when she poured some wine into his glass.

"Kenshin," She spoke, her voice was as soft and sweet as Kenshin could remember. "You don't love me, do you?"

Kenshin was dumbfounded for a second but forced his heart not to react to the unexpected question. "Why are you asking me this?"

Kaoru slightly took a sip from her wine glass. "I won't be surprise if you say yes. After all, you've just been force into this marriage."

Kenshin raised an eyebrow and turned sideways looking at his wife. "I don't know what you're talking about Kaoru."

Kaoru stared at his amber eyes. "I miss you Kenshin." She said softly. She reached out her hand and touched Kenshin's face. "Please don't walk away from me."

Kenshin felt his heart beat faster. His traitor heart, it always reacts the way he doesn't want it to.

Kenshin took Kaoru into his arms; embracing her as tight as he could, trying his best to control his mind away from memories of Shinta.

_'She missed me...she doesn't want me to leave her...'_ Kenshin repeated in his head. As if convincing himself; using Kaoru's own words like magical chants.

Kaoru smiled and hugged Kenshin back. She soon felt Kenshin's lips kissing the back of her ear. "Kenshin..." She whimpered, moving her head slightly to give Kenshin more access.

Kenshin took the invitation, his warm lips starts to nibble on her ear down to her neck. He smiled when he heard his wife's soft moan. Kenshin leaned back to stare at his woman's face. Her eyes were close, waiting for his caress.

Kenshin obeyed and started kissing Kaoru's lips; he gently tugged on her lower lip and was gratified when Kaoru parted her lips and allowed Kenshin to taste her mouth fully.

Kaoru felt her husband's hand snaked between them, touching her breast through her thin sleeping dress. "Kenshin..."

Kenshin heard Kaoru's needy whimper. "Let's go koiishi…I don't want the maids seeing us doing this." He said matter-of-factly.

Kaoru stifled a chuckle and let Kenshin carry her back to their bedroom.

She missed him so much...if the only way to cross the invisible bridge he built between them was through making love, she will will make love to him as much as he wanted.

Inside their bedroom; on their four canopy queen size bed, Kenshin is a different man. He don't utter harsh words...he don't push her away. He is her husband, kissing her, loving her, embracing her like she was life itself.

The heat between them died down and Kaoru let Kenshin rolled off her and lay beside her. "Kenshin..." Kaoru called as she soothingly placed her head on his chest.

"Kaoru..." Kenshin replied hoarsely. "...I'm tired...sleep." He said with his eyes closed.

Kaoru sadly stared at his face. _'You're lying...you're not tired...you just don't want to talk to me...'_ She felt like crying again.

Kenshin felt his wife left his side and heard the rustle of fabric as she re-dresses. He let her leave the room and forced himself to sleep. As always, he does not want to talk to her.

Kaoru meandered back to the bar and sat in front of the piano. She smiled when she remembered Shinta sitting on the very chair she was sitting on. _'Shinta...'_ She opened the piano lid and started playing a sad song.

_Candles burning _

_Glasses are chilled _

_And soon he'll be by _

She could feel her tears dropped on the piano keys. Her tears were not for Shinta…not anymore. _'Shinta...I think...'_ She sobbed quietly as she continues to play the song. _'...I'm losing Kenshin...like you.'_ She silently prayed that Shinta was listening to her.

_Hope and pray he'll _

_Say that he's willing _

_To give it another try _

Her heart died when he died, she remembered losing all her hopes and dreams when Shinta left her. But Kenshin was there to save her broken soul, he saved her and she felt her broken heart began to mend.

_And if all these plans are made _

_Don't melt the lady's heart _

_I'll put on the old forty-five _

Her heart warmed at the memories of Kenshin showing her that she was the most important thing in his life.

_Maybe the old songs _

_Will bring back the old times _

Since Shinta's death, Kenshin was always by her side, talking to her, wiping her tears whenever Shinta's memories kicked in. She remembered Kenshin holding her hand when she was only wishing for the God to take her life because she can no longer take the pain.

_Maybe the old lines _

_Will sound new _

Kenshin was her pillar of strength. He was there when everything around her crumbled.

_Maybe he'll lay her head _

_On my shoulder _

And when her father told her that she will be marrying Kenshin, she felt sad for him. She knew that Kenshin did not love her. She was far too plain compared to all the women she heard Kenshin was dating before.

_Maybe old feelings _

_Will come true _

But the day Kenshin came to her and asked her hand for marriage. She felt her heart beat faster again, even Shinta was not able to make her heart beat that fast. However, the happy moment was shadowed by the reality, that Kenshin was only doing that to save her from marrying Shishio Makoto.

_Maybe we'll start to cry _

_And wonder why _

_We ever walked away _

He once again saved her…first her soul, then heart and then her future.

_Maybe the old songs _

_Will bring the old times _

She even asked herself, on the day she made the vow in front of the church and all the people close to her heart_. 'Will you ever get tired of saving me Kenshin?'_ Her question was answered when Kenshin smiled at her and kissed her lips for the first time. _'...hope not.'_

_And make him wanna stay _

Kaoru wiped her tears away and gently pushed the wooden lid to cover the piano.

Once again, she could feel her heart breaking. _'Will I survive the day you will come and tell me that it's over Kenshin?'_ She asked silently. _'Who will save me once you decided to let go?'_

Kaoru yet again failed to stop her tears.

**o+++++0+++++o**

**Japanese words used:**

nii – _big brother_

koishii – _beloved_

**o+++++0+++++o**

**Author's Note:**

**Hi everyone, this is my second time trying to write an RK fic ^^ it's been a while since I wrote a fanfic story. I know I still have a lot of things to improve on and I'm really trying my best!**

**The title of the song is "THE OLD SONG" by David Pomeranz, I really love this song, it brings too much emotion of longing and love ^^**

**You can consider this story as a one-shot, but I don't really like sad endings so if I happen to receive some good reviews maybe I'll make it longer and make another chapter. No pressure though, I know I'm still a newbie but loving this anime couple really brings out a lot of emotion in me, just want to express that by simply writing a fanfic ^^ **

**Reviews will be very much appreciated! Thanks so much for reading! JA!**

**SAIHEI signing OFF **


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